“Beginning to understand the wish to die”

I’ve been playing bass for most of my life, and I’ve enjoyed music my entire life. Through all these years I’ve seen the passion for music destroy more than it’s healed. I know people say that music is the best therapy but it’s not the same as true therapy. Music can heal the pain temporarily but once the high is gone then the pain just comes back stronger.

This cycle continues and drives many musicians into a narcissistic state. These musicians feed the music their heart and soul, they pour everything they have into it and sacrifice their friends, family and careers over it. I know that it takes deep emotions to write many of the songs and lyrics that artists put out, then when the success comes and goes the pain and depression can set back in.

There’s a love/hate relationship between the musician and the pain because they feel like they need it to write music. This is what causes musicians to delay getting help. I think the intense musical relationship to the notes and songs comes from a deep understanding of where the writer was at emotionally when they wrote the songs. As a writer capturing those emotions and feelings in the music is a great release, and it gives closure or allows the artist to express something that they couldn’t just outright say. One of my favorite authors is Frank Kafka, he expressed himself through writing and struggled in the same way that many artists struggle today. Stay strong, and always give life one more day, suicide is not an option. We are Band Nerds. “One of the first signs of the beginning of understanding is the wish to die” Kafka

2 comments

  • Kimberly

    Kimberly Westminster, TX

    I just discovered y'all today, from the Lost in Vegas reaction. The song was great, so I went over to your channel and watched that video several more times, because I was thrilled to see so many places I recognized in it. Had to watch once to focus on the music/instrumentals, next time for lyrics, next time for scenery. Well done. Then I moved on to other videos and then Facebook, then here, next will be Spotify, and so on. As for gigs, I know it's disheartening, the way the scene works. I've got a number of friends in the Dallas and Denton music grind, but man, don't lose your passion. What you are doing is a gift to the world. It's a bridge. I'm new to you, but I HEAR you. New people are getting turned on to your sound. I hope that translates into success, not just monetarily, but emotionally as well. I do hope to see y'all live. There are still plenty of us, especially in the metal world, that go to a LOT of live shows, so don't give up on that. I'll be signing up for the email list. Rock on.

    I just discovered y'all today, from the Lost in Vegas reaction. The song was great, so I went over to your channel and watched that video several more times, because I was thrilled to see so many places I recognized in it. Had to watch once to focus on the music/instrumentals, next time for lyrics, next time for scenery. Well done. Then I moved on to other videos and then Facebook, then here, next will be Spotify, and so on. As for gigs, I know it's disheartening, the way the scene works. I've got a number of friends in the Dallas and Denton music grind, but man, don't lose your passion. What you are doing is a gift to the world. It's a bridge. I'm new to you, but I HEAR you. New people are getting turned on to your sound. I hope that translates into success, not just monetarily, but emotionally as well.
    I do hope to see y'all live. There are still plenty of us, especially in the metal world, that go to a LOT of live shows, so don't give up on that.
    I'll be signing up for the email list. Rock on.

  • Sandman

    Sandman Ft Worth

    Thanks so much. Things are already getting better.

    Thanks so much. Things are already getting better.

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